Pondering the Nature of Man and Woman (Briefly)

Anthropologically, it is the male's purpose in life to seek out mates and procreate. Traditionally, I have not had a problem with this kind of behavior. In fact, even now, I do not seem to have a problem with this kind of behavior. The funny thing about humans is that they allow feelings to get involved. There are mating rituals, many of which are a complete waste of time. There are glances, coos, brief contact of hands or feet, efforts to move in close in order to take in the prospective mate's scent. And when it clicks, you know it. It is instantaneous and electric. You want nothing more than to be close to that person. Physically, both men and women have an intense urge to procreate - or at least conduct the act which (without precautions) leads to procreation. But the mating dance can go a number of ways. Presently, it is predominantly socially unacceptable in western societies for women to engage in acts of instant gratification. Emotions tend to wiggle their way into the mix, and a type of courtship ensues. Realistically, it can be theorized that the man is merely following the rules of the courtship - the rules set in place primarily by women - in order to achieve his opportunity for copulation. This can go on for weeks, even months. Most men are willing to play this game. And most men find that, once they do achieve the ultimate act of physical contact, they want more. I would even suggest that, instead of seeking out another potential mate and enduring another mating ritual that could last a number of weeks or months, many men prefer to stick with what they know they can have, thereby ensuring their opportunity for procreation - if not pleasure as well, at least during the initial phase. And this is what we call a long-term relationship.

Where some may scorn men who constantly seek out mating opportunities, others may view this behavior as opportunistic, ambitious, anthropologically inherent. It has become more and more socially forbidden over time for men to behave in this way - perhaps because the urgent necessity to populate humanity is virtually eliminated. We are a society of partnerships, bonded humans. Those who stray from the norm, cannot fit into the norm, or who shun the norm are considered outsiders, nonconformists, even socially immoral. But why must people hide or be ashamed of their deepest physical root of humanity?

Admittedly, although I encompass some opportunistic qualities, I am intrinsically a partnership type. I find it interesting, therefore (and perhaps worth greater exploration) that I have spent a majority of my partnerships (or potential parterships) alone, or with men who can be typecast as opportunistic. I do not find great fault with the nature of these men. It is clear, however, that I will never have a truly meaningful partnership in life until I gravitate away from instant gratification and allow the man who shares an interest in human bonding (not just physically and temporarily) to find me and turn on that instantaneous, electric spark. I believe it is also possible that I harbor an internal fear of commitment - not necessarily the act of commitment itself, but the potential for loss. And that's another ballgame entirely...